Monday, July 31, 2006

Ode to Le Camera Phone

I was going to post some totally rocking pictures that I took with my camera phone, but alas, the internet has decided that I am NOT ALLOWED!


I've become quite the Japanese tourist. I take pictures all the time with my camera phone. ALL the time. Enough that I made people pose for a camera phone pic during dinner tonight. Yikes.

My digital camera has been broken for the last year as I left it in my backpack during one too many swim practices and it conked out. I have yet to fix it. But! It has been sitting in my apartment in NYC for a couple of months. Progress from sitting at home in McLean.

While I would take awesomely good pictures with my high tech Canon Rebel! that I bought two years ago all the time it:
a) uses film, which costs money that I don't have for the bad pictures I will inevitably take
b) is obvious, which is thumbs down when you are trying to photograph Dr. McDreamy or white leggings, yes WHITE! I know, you so want to see them. Gosh! Stupid Internet.

Unfortunately the camera phone takes pictures of the utmost crappy resolution—but without I would have missed documenting:
1. that I was three feet from McDreamy. drool.
2. Jess cleaning herself after falling in a mud puddle. HA!
3. the rabbit/French fight in Washington Square Park.

Oh wow internet, you are holding yourself in suspense. Why are you being so silly!?!

Friday, July 28, 2006

To: The Bathroom Talkers

People. People. Seriously, what is up with having phone conversations in the bathroom? Even if you aren’t pulling a talk-and-flush, I am going to flush eventually, and then whoever you’re talking to will know that you are IN A RESTROOM! Doesn’t this concern you? Maybe you want to have a private conversation with your boyfriend, take a walk around the building! Maybe you need to call your cell phone company about your broken phone…do it from your desk, please. I would much rather listen to that discussion at my desk than while I’m trying to pee.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Update: Four Stitches and an Estimated $1200 Poorer

Yesterday I got four stitches out of my finger.

Ten days ago I found out the harddrive of my computer had crashed. (Yes, this is related...) And the dude at the Apple store, was NOT very sympathetic about it. He was so nonchalant that I thought he was joking. He was not.

I was pretty upset with myself for letting this happen considering that:
a) My dad works with computers for a living and every Saturday during my childhood the computer was OFF LIMITS for several hours (It was the 90s, people!) while it was being BACKED UP.
b) I spilled water on my computer in the middle of senior year and was without a computer for three weeks, after I dried it out and turned it on, which lasted a good 15 minutes before it short circuited. So I had already gone through the pain of losing all the digital images of my college years! However! They were saved! It was only the motherboard. This time the Powerbook was not so lucky.
c) This was Sayonara! to $300, $336.73 to be precise. Which I could doublely not afford because I had joined a gym that I can't afford four days earlier, taking $300 out of my Savings account, that I was going to put back in when I got paid, but it went to Mikey at Mikey's HookUp in Brooklyn that nonchalant Apple guy directed me to for repairs.

So what I do?


I was going to clean until I became a responsible adult and that meant scraping the purple nail polish that I spilled when I broke a bottle three months ago off the bathroom floor. And once I was down there...yikes!...the nail polish was on the toliet bowl, and on the wall, and on the pipes.

And oh wow! What's that there behind the toliet? A BIG PIECE OF GLASS COVERED IN PURPLE POLISH AND HAS DRIED TO THE FLOOR?


And then I went into HYSTERICS.

FlynnFact: Bridget has major blood curdling screams. In fourth grade she tripped and fell outside her mom's preschool classroom and the Pre-K teacher thought she had been hit by a car.

So hysterics....and here's why I am really proud of myself: I wasn't crying and freaking out because of the HEART BEAT in my finger. I was crying and freaking out because I had FAILED as a responsible adult. (And no one was answering their phone to come save me.)

So when Lizzie showed up in the ER, she found this to be quite humorous.

I'm also blamming this whole incident on my recent acquisition of health insurance and the FlynnFact that I like use, open, put on or wear whatever new thing I get, the second I get it.

But seriously, it could have been worse as I almost had health insurance.

But still, I shouldn't have boasted to everyone that "I can now get hit by a cab!"

Or maybe I should just learn my lesson and NOT take unclaimed Sunday papers. Because, maybe, that was really the cause of my hospital visit until 4 am.

And let me just say, there are some real characters hanging around New York City ER's in the middle of the night.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Hey Mom! Look what I did!

Woo! That's French Bull
The last two sentences, may not be mine, but I SWOON over my words in digital land.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

"Shit" that's Funny

Two years ago I was saying that if we reelected Bush, at least we'd have someone to laugh at for the next four years. Not that we wouldn't have laughed at Kerry or that it's hard to find politicaliticians who've done or said something stupid each day, but when it comes to speaking publicly, or privately to Tony Blair on an open mic feed STRAIGHT to the "disgraceful" media, there's no one more comical than shit-talker George W. Bush.

The good Christian cusses! Muuhahaha.

What I really love about this story: every journalist mentions that Bush was "munching on a buttered roll" when he dropped the expletive.

As much as I dislike the man, he does have a point. HOWEVER, please, oh please get anyone to solve this latest world peace dilema or it will be:

"Premature Victory! And Buttered Rolls for ALL!"

Sunday, July 16, 2006

The Great Wine Giveaway

This is my desk at work:

Juan: Wow. You have a job. All college frat boys. Dream of.

Yes, yes I do.

Happy Birthday to Jackie

For Jackie's bday I got her the coolest card.

Front (Black background, White writing): It's your birthday and I got you this card!!!

Inside (White Duh. Black Writing): This is the inside!

And then a drew a cool stick figure drawing of me and her holding hands and glasses of beer. Jackie with Bud Light. Bridget with Miller Lite.

Back: This is the back!

Jackie: Thank you for the card. It was awesone..and very Bridget.
Me: you're welcome!!!
Me: did you like the drawing
Jackie: I LOVED IT!
Jackie: it was beautiful

Jackie totally rocks my socks.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

So I Never Did Find Out What Happened

with the BOMB SCARE.

I forgot to watch the news. Opps.

And the next day I frantically looked from Metro New York: nothing; spent the first hour, or so...looking up stuff online: nothing; brought it up with my boss at lunch: a very disinterested-this-happens-all-the-time-"Oh yeah? Did you hear about the other one the other day?"

SO! I don't know what happened and so-called o'mighty seeks of truth, ahem, journalists have FAILED me. But my dad and my co-worker suggested that since no one died the story wouldn't be published, so as to not encourage any crazy bastards. Point taken.


Do the o'might seeks of truth know that little ol'me was making herself a salad when her actress roommate burst through the door of the hallway-kitchen entrance and said (dramatically!) :

"There's a bomb scare!"

"A what? Are you joking?"

"I just talked to a lady and she said that they've tackled a man in front of the Chirping Chicken aand that he went in there with fake bomb a couple of days ago, but today he has a real bomb. There's police! And fire trucks! And the street is blocked off!"

"I JUST ate there!"


"You should go out and see it!"

Then I couldn't really get myself out the door, Do I need my keys? Do I need a space suit? A shield? My dinner! I lie, I was just worried about my keys because I locked myself out of my apartment back in April. And my dinner.

Once outside: Why am I walking towards a bomb? Stupid. Yet, so curious! Oooh. Lots of cute firemen. Oh. I don't look so good, I was planning on doing laundry. First Avenue is blocked. Can't get to laundry mat. Involuntary procrastination. Sweet.

A curious observence: some New Yorkers didn't even care about this. Emotion, please! They were going for a run! They were going to catch a cab! Ha. Suckers. Point is: there were many people that tried to cross blocked-off First Ave.

And later when it was over and traffic had started flowing again. you would have never know it happened. On the way to the laundry mat I saw detectives talking to a man in a tie-dyed shirt, the same man people mentioned when I was standing around outside? There was a ton of broken glass on the opposite side of the street, but it might not have been related. The Chirppin Chicken was serving food. I was the only one still confused, curious and worried. To everyone else, it was late, dark and as Annie likes to say, "already tomorrow."